You fell deeply in love with someone who really “got you”. At one point in time, you felt deeply connected. Cared for. Valued. And understood. Now you’re struggling to find the love; and it’s been months or maybe even years of feeling like this.
It really hurts to be missing your person like this. It is all so confusing too because you used to have this wonderful experience and you might be asking yourself now: “How did we get to this place?” The panic is probably also setting in because maybe you and your partner continue to have the same type of arguments over and over again, no matter what you are talking about. Most often what is occurring is one person is getting louder in desperation and the other is shutting down or walking away to cool things off. Unfortunately in this dance, the tension gets worse & the mistrust builds the more a couple becomes stuck in the endless arguing. We have helped couples stuck in this place many times before to see through this repetitive dynamic and find their way back to one another & back to the bond between them. There is hope for the relationship still even though it may be hard to see in the heat of anger, hurt, and panic.
Also, in addition to the regular patterns of disconnection that couples are struggling with, many couples can have the added struggle of dealing with a recent or lingering “injury” present in the relationship. This injury could be from an event, where one person completely shattered the other person’s trust. Sometimes this is infidelity that we are talking about, and other times it occurs when a partner abandons their partner at a time of crucial need. Often after an event so impactful, the injured party says to themselves they will “never again” trust their partner & the injuring partner feels lost as to what to do. Whether you were the injured party or the injuring, we know that both people are suffering after an event like this happens, even if partners do not always show it. In many cases, there is a desire from both in the relationship to connect & have the trust rebuilt. In case this applies to you & you were wondering if it is possible to repair the trust, we want you to know that yes, it is possible. We have helped many couples in this predicament before. A therapist can help you both hold the intense emotions in a more manageable way so they do not over power and overwhelm like they so often have before.
To summarize, if you are looking at this page, you ultimately want the love, trust, appreciation, and connection with your person back. Couples therapy can help you get the connection that you yearn for & we have the tools to help couples with these types of concerns. Ideally though, the sooner you come to couples counseling, the better the energy and commitment that you and your partner will have to work through this turbulent time in your relationship. When you & your partner both take the risk to share with each other more openly with the help of a therapist – you can begin to come together on behalf of the relationship & transform the way you interact with each other in a powerful way. Some people have even been surprised when they thought the embers for their connection were almost completely out and there was still quite a spark between them underneath the conflict. We would be honored to be a part of your journey in helping you come back closer together.